Tag: end of life care

Improving End-of-Life Care for Pets: A Collaborative Approach with Dr. Azure Holland

This week, I had the privilege of visiting two incredible veterinary hospitals—Animal Hospital of Brier Creek and Paws at Play Veterinary Hospital. During my time there, I had in-depth discussions with their teams about providing better end-of-life care for pets. As someone who is deeply passionate about this aspect of veterinary care, it was both heartwarming and humbling to share insights and offer guidance to help these hospitals navigate the challenging yet essential process of helping families make tough decisions when it’s time to say goodbye to their beloved pets.

At the heart of what my team and I do at Azure Holland is helping families decide when it’s time for their pet to pass on peacefully. It’s an emotional and challenging decision, but with the right support, tools, and language, families can feel confident that they are making the best choice for their pet’s well-being. We explored how veterinary teams can better communicate this decision-making process with pet parents, helping them understand their options and the benefits of making end-of-life care a compassionate experience.

While at these two hospitals, I had the opportunity to coach the staff on enhancing the end-of-life experience within their facilities. From fostering open, empathetic conversations to improving the physical environment, there are many ways we can ensure that the final moments are as peaceful and dignified as possible for both the pet and their family. These small changes in approach can make a big difference in the overall experience, ensuring that families leave feeling supported and at peace with their decision.

One of the key aspects that sets Azure Holland apart is our commitment to providing the highest level of care within the home environment. We believe that pets and their families deserve a comfortable, familiar, and loving space during such an intimate time. Our team works to ensure that the pet’s final moments are peaceful, pain-free, and surrounded by the love of their family. By offering this in-home care, we help families avoid the stress and uncertainty of a hospital setting during this emotionally intense time.

We are always looking for ways to collaborate with veterinary hospitals to ensure that pets and families receive the best possible end-of-life care. If you’re a veterinary professional looking to improve your hospital’s end-of-life approach, we’d love to get to know your team and provide training on the language, tools, and techniques that can help make this difficult time easier for families to navigate. Together, we can offer compassionate care and support to every family that entrusts us with their pets.

End-of-life decisions are never easy, but they are a natural part of every pet’s journey. At Azure Holland, we are committed to walking alongside families through this process with understanding, compassion, and care. If you’re interested in learning more about our services or would like to partner with us to enhance your hospital’s end-of-life care, please don’t hesitate to reach out. Together, we can make these final moments as peaceful and loving as possible.

Loss and Grief with Dr. Holland

The loss of your dog or cat is one of the hardest things that a pet parent has to navigate.  Throughout this journey of the final life stage, there are an array of emotions that can come up.  I have had to say goodbye to beloved fur babies and the grief has been intense.  Here are some things that have come up in me as I have traveled along the path of grief and loss and to finally finding happiness again.

Is it crazy for this to hurt so much?

No. The grief that I have felt for a beloved pet passing surpasses anything that I have felt for another human in their passing.  Pets are often the center of the home and the focus of our love and attention.  They comfort us and they know us fully, including our habits and secrets.  They are often our “mini-me’s”  and it’s only natural that with a relationship that strong and meaningful that we could have a powerful amount of grief.

Here are the 6 stages of grief and how they may show up in the process of losing a pet: 

  1. Shock and disbelief-  the first responses to the loss of a beloved pet.  This can last anywhere from a few hours to several days.
  2. Anger, alienation and distancing- anger can come up in many forms.  Often there is anger about the disease that took your baby, or at the Dr. that wasn’t able to save them.  Anger when carried to an extreme level can keep you from moving through the healing process and fully experiencing grief.
  3. Denial- having trouble accepting that your fur baby is really gone.  Typically this stage is very quick and is rooted in fantasy.
  4. Guilt- the more that you loved your baby, the more likely you are to experience guilt.  Experiencing guilt on some level is very natural as we rethink the final life stage of your fur baby and the decisions made for care at the end.
  5. Depression- It is normal to feel depression with intense mourning. With the loss of all my babies and in particular my kitty Mantis, the depression was pretty marked.  I would wake up in the morning and ask myself, “Will I ever be happy again?”.  I was already in therapy at the time Mantis passed and I used sessions to process this incredible loss. *If the depression becomes too intense or prolonged than one should seek help from a trained professional
  6. Resolution- a time for spiritual healing.  In this final stage, we move through the grief and are able to hold onto the memories and the love of our beloved while moving forward with life’s activities.

How can I process my feelings?

The most therapeutic thing we can do is lean into our emotions and pain.  In order to get through the other side of grief, we have to feel deeply and sit with the heartbreak and anguish of the loss. Bottling it up and pretending we are ok will only delay the healing process.  I have found it especially helpful to speak with my trusted therapist or friends that are pet people.  Getting the feelings out is the most important part of the healing process.  Crying is one of the most cleansing and cathartic things that we can do for the soul.  Other ways to process and move grief through your body:  exercise, dance, meditation, journaling, etc. Express yourself and try not to hold it in.

I have been lucky to be surrounded by other pet people during my grieving process.  If you don’t have pet people in your inner circle, seek them out.  This type of understanding can be so very helpful in your healing journey.

Some practical suggestions:

Find other sympathetic and supportive people to lean on to get your feelings out in a safe environment.

Allow emotions to flow, don’t bottle them up.

It’s never too late to say something to your beloved deceased pet. Write a letter to them sharing how much you love recounting the special memories that you have.

Dedicate or donate something in your pet’s name.  Knowing that they are helping other fur babies is a way for them to continue on.

Establish new routines at home. Pets, more than anything in our lives, are rooted in our living patterns. Don’t be scared to shake things up!

Hold some sort of private service or memorial for your pet.  This can be as simple or as involved as you wish.

Attend a pet loss or bereavement support group.  Allow yourself to share fully and experience the grief in a safe space.

If/When you are ready to bring a new fur baby into your life, tell them stories of your beloved one who passed.

How do I know when it is time to put my pet to sleep?

This is one of the hardest questions I get asked.  I have recently told a family to talk to your pet, they will tell you when it is time.  That may sound like strange advice, put it is true.  As pet owners we all know when our pet is trying to tell us something.  I have met with folks that often struggle with this issue and I have used the quality of life scale developed by Dr. Alice Villalobos as a guide to help owners access their pet’s current quality of life.  I have posted Dr. Villalobos scale for you to download and work through.  Please feel free to call me to discuss your pet’s specific situation, I always offer free consultations.  I am honored to serve familes with my mobile vet service in Raleigh, Durham and Chapel Hill.

Quality Of Life worksheet

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